The Commandments of Biblia

Biblia's Sacred Commandments

As revealed to subscribers to The Biblia Files
(as with most revelations, inconsistencies abound)

If you start a book, you must read the entire thing, cover to cover, every word.
Corollary: If it takes you more than a month to finish, you get extra brownie points for being persistent.

Cracking the spine of a book is evil - they should look as good as new when you are done reading it.
Corollary: Folding down a page to mark one's place is a lesser sin, but a sin nonetheless.

Thou shalt not write in books!

An abridgement does not count as reading a book. Cliff notes don't come even close.

Never see a movie version of a book before you have read the book, unless the movie is based on a book you are positive you will never read.

Hardcovers should be read without the dustjacket, especially if reading in bed.

Never read the back of the book once you're out of the store (if you can help it) -- and if it has a foreword save that for last.

Never start a series unless you're reasonably sure you can get all of the books in it.

When in a bookstore with a friend always get them to suggest a book for you that you've never heard of.

Always look at every category in a used bookstore. Especially the one marked "Misc".

Bookshelves must be divided into two sections, "read" and "unread". If the "unread" section exceeds the "read" section in size, you must feel guilty.
Corollary 1: You mustn't feel so guilty that you pass up good opportunities to acquire books.
Corollary 2: Only cheap paperbacks should be stored on the bottom shelf so it's not such a tragedy when the cats chew on them.

Biblia, when displeased can be placated by buying more books.

Once you've bought a book and read it, it is a part of your family and you can't give it away. It may occasionally go on vacations, but only with trusted friends of the family with compatable family rules.

Books need to travel and if they don't come back it just means that it wasn't meant to be.

A book worth reading is a book worth owning.

And of course, there is our divinely inspired message revealed to Biblia’s prophet Scott:

Reading a copy of Bertrand Russell's A History of Western Philosophy I found myself falling asleep. When I awoke, it was dusk and I found myself standing on mountain. The smell of jasmine came from barren ground. Before me, supported by an unseen hand was an enormous book - leatherbound with a gilt edge. It appeared to be on fire and yet, was not consumed. I averted my eyes for I knew that I was unworthy. A voice called out, "Why do you who would seek truth hide from it now?" I was emboldened. I looked at the pages and they were blank before my eyes but full in my mind. The power of the truth frightened me and again I looked away. The cloudless sky rumbled with thunder and the mountain shook. Again I faced the fullness of the empty pages. When the last of it was revealed, the book closed and vanished. At that moment I found myself back in my house, Bertrand Russell's tome laying face down on my left leg, opened to page 666.

I knew what I must do. Share the revealed word of Biblia. And so it is written, so let it be done.

Have no other media before books.

Thou shalt not read from false books - e-books, on-line, cliff-notes.

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbors books, nor her bookmarks, nor her "already-read" list, nor anything that is thy neighbors.

Thou shalt not read in vain (in low light).

Honor the bookstore, and keep it holy - and a viable alternative to on-line purchases.

If you love a book, set it free. It will come back to you 1000 times. Give, that others may read, and know the grace of the one true Biblia.

Thou shalt have no dustjackets on any book. Such things are visual and therefore sacrilege. Remove them upon purchase, tear them, crumple them and throw them into the bowels of hell. (except maybe for coffee-table books)

Thou shalt not steal books from the library.

Thou shalt not lie about what you have read.

Honor your mother's and father's books, because someday thay may be yours.

BibliaFiles subscribers: If Biblia speaks to you of a new commandment, mail the list and share it with the rest of the BibliaFiles.